As if COVID19 wasn’t enough, the past month of June was one of the bloodiest in South Africa. Gender-Based Violence (GBV) is a fight we thought we would have won by now. But instead, fellow women’s bodies are literally piling up like no one is watching.
There are a plethora of societal issues and prejudices that are so deep-rooted, sixth sense in nature, that often contribute to GBV, and we certainly don’t have the space to cover them all. And sadly at times even women have also bought into these patterns of thought for centuries. The idea that perhaps he loves me, that’s why he beats me is not innate, it’s learned, taught. The expectation that a man will step out on you and there’s no point in asking him why or the idea that there’s only trouble to be gained by such a question can often be passed on from mother to daughter.
To say we need a radical ideological paradigm shift almost feels like an understatement. But the fight continues and we must do something. For most of the journey, women have raised their voices and continue to shout from the rooftops that we need justice for the lives we have lost, often at the hands of our very own brothers and uncles and fathers and friends. We cannot fight this battle alone. Men need to be visible at the forefront too. Taking from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s sentiment: together we must learn to live…or together we will indeed be forced to perish as fools. Men need to reach other men, men need to educate other men and strive to deconstruct the demon that is toxic masculinity.
We can protest and fight and let our voices ring, and to be sure women are a powerful entity. But the reality is we live on this planet with male species and we need them as much as they need us.
As we look forward to women’s month, let’s fight to make GBV a non-reality for the next generation, by teaching our boys to appreciate and respect the strength of a woman, and our girls to harness the strength of their voices.
Some recommended reads:
Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche – Dear Ijeawele: A feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions.
Mikki Kendall – Hood Feminism: Notes from the women that the movement forgot